If you have been broken up with and you want to know how to get your ex back, I can show you how many others have gotten their ex back after being dumped.
Is it a fool-proof plan?
Does it work 100% of the time?
No, but what does?
What I can tell you is that after twenty years in the relationship-coaching service, I’ve seen a lot.
I’ve watched a lot of people do the wrong things that only served to push their ex further away.
I’ve guided thousands to get their ex back after being dumped and often times that was by convincing them that their instincts were incorrect.
After a breakup, what you feel would help the situation is often what will push your ex away even further from you.
You are in shock, hurting, and desperate to get your ex back.
It feels like if you don’t do something big, profound, and immediately, your ex will slip away from you and you’ll never be able to get them back.
I can tell you emphatically that what you feel is not always real — especially not in this situation.
Time is actually on your side. It often surprises people to know that it is time that can help bring their ex back to them and that the feeling of having to get your ex back immediately is incorrect.
You don’t have to get your ex back today in order to get them back.
While that pressure feels real to you, as though your ex is getting away, that’s actually not how it works.
Your ex is not the person you remember.
Those tender memories of the two of you together mislead you in this moment.
While it might feel like you could talk to that person you remember and wake them up from this nightmare, it won’t work that way.
The reason for that is because your ex isn’t the same person.
Attraction has fallen and so their motivation to stay in the relationship, work on it, and to be with you has fallen.
That’s why your ex broke up with you.
Having a talk with someone won’t revive their attraction for you.
What is actually going to have to happen is for your ex to experience the breakup.
It takes a while for that to happen because after the breakup, your ex feels more attractive than you.
After all, they were the one who broke up with you and put you aside.
In essence, your ex moved you below them on the totem pole of attraction.
Whereas before, you two were equally attracted to each other, now your ex views you as less attractive.
This is the main reason why trying to talk your ex out of the breakup won’t be effective.
You can’t talk someone into being attracted to you.
In order for your ex to be attracted to you again, you must turn the tables in terms of who is in control and who is feeling loss.
When your ex dumped you, he/she felt control.
After all, they were calling the shots. They were breaking up with you.
You were losing them and the relationship.
In fact, your ex became your dictator because you likely felt like you could only beg for mercy from your ex.
Because of that, your ex felt like they could get you back at any time if they wanted to. ‘
Your ex had total control.
When you use the No Contact Rule, however, in time, you can change the dynamics of this.
The reason is that when your ex doesn’t hear from you and observes that you aren’t chasing them or appearing to make an effort to get them back, your ex wonders if you have “moved on.”
That’s when the realization can strike your ex that they could want to get back together with you, but not be able to get you back.
Now it is you who are in control and your ex who feels the loss.
The tables have turned.
That is when your attraction goes up along with your odds of reuniting with your ex. Watch the video above for more information. It’s on YouTube at “How To Get My Ex Back.”
-Coach Lee
